Wonderful: an underrated word

3 Sep

This morning I read the most wonderful of status updates on Facebook. A colleague and her husband welcomed a little boy, born just over a week ago, into their home and hearts. They are fostering this little boy with the goal of adoption.

Wonderful.

I’ve always admired the love (and often relentless paperwork and determination) it takes for a person/a couple to choose  to welcome with open hearts and homes another who is not theirs yet. And while their hearts and homes may be open, like those of all expectant parents, they are by no means empty. They are full of bassinets, stuffed toys, diapers, wet wipes, bottles, sterilizers, monitors, books, blankets, hopes, dreams, love and wonder.

Wonderful.

I can only tell my story with any certainty but knowing the universality of parenting, I can’t imagine that my first hours, days and weeks as a mother were any different than what my colleague and her husband are going through right now.

I remember cradling this unbelievably tiny being in my arms and wondering how did I get so lucky? And thinking to myself, I wonder if your eyes will stay this blue. I wonder if you can feel how much I love you. I wonder how I’m going to keep you safe. I wonder what I’m doing/will do wrong. I wonder what kind of person you will be. I wonder if you realise how amazing you are. I wonder what you dream about. I wonder if I’ll ever be worthy enough of you. I simply wonder and I am full.

Wonderful.

 

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